As I am sitting here thinking about all the food that overpowered me today, I think that it was almost a year to the day that I was diagnosed with diabetes. Of course the diagnoses last year was a little different because I was pregnant and the time, but I still have the diabetes. I remember being surprised how quick I was able to stop eating what I shouldn't and eat right. My blood sugars were very much in control, and I felt very good about it. After my glucose tolerance test on March 5, 2008 to discover that I was still a diabetic after my son was born, I had a little pouting time and then I got back on track again. I did good all summer. Then in July and August I started having trouble with my blood sugars. They went from low hundreds (where they should be) to 300 and sometime 400. I was eating right and exercising daily. I felt so discouraged. I had lost 40 pounds, but then I gave in one time to those stupid ice cream treats they sell at Sonic, and I just keep having problems. It's not just the calories that I have to watch, it's the carbohydrates too. I want so desperately to loose all this weight, for the diabetes to disappear and for me to go on living a carefree life with food. I realize that it is not going to be that simple. I need to be able to not think about food all the time, and to exercise daily and stay away from certain foods. I just keep praying that I will get it. I will keep trying. Even know I have put on about 15 pounds that I lost over the summer, I have got to remember that I need to fight the fat. It’s not just that I want to be skinny. It is first and for most that I want to be healthy. I also do not want my boys to see a mother who just sits there and can’t do anything because she is to heavy. I want to active and have fun!!! God help me to get this right. I know I am to weak to do this by myself, but I know you are strong enough to do it for me.